I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
