Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
