How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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