All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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