White coat. Heels.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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