HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
