no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
So squirting runs in the family.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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