Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
