He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
