Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
