He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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