your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
