You made me cry and you don't even care
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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