I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
