Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
