just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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