They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
