I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize