He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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