the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
