What did we do last night that was yellow?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
