Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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