Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
