Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
