Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
