see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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