Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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