ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
