Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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