All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i was born a porn star she said
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
