are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Randomize
