he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
