he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
