Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
