Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I miss vodka workout Fridays
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
