is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
