Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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