On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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