high people should be assigned attendants
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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