what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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