Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
