Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
