Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
