I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
