idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
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