the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
