he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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