i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
