Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
