Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
